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Post by Aunt Arlene on Sept 15, 2004 22:37:35 GMT -5
"We're out of the bottled stuff, so you'll just have to settle for what's on tap."
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Post by PyleansDontLeaveMe on Sept 16, 2004 10:55:31 GMT -5
'You looking for rabbits again, vicar?'
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Post by Aunt Arlene on Sept 17, 2004 17:24:19 GMT -5
The old man looks at Jesus and says, "Pinocchio?"
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Post by TealBox on Sept 18, 2004 5:40:20 GMT -5
But not a real green dress, that's cruel.
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Post by bitterman on Oct 5, 2004 21:51:39 GMT -5
RIP Rodney Dangerfield, 1921-2004.
"I tell ya I get no respect from anyone. I bought a cemetery plot. The guy said, 'There goes the neighborhood!'"
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"When I was born, I was so ugly that the doctor slapped my mother."
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"When I started in show business, I played one club that was so far out, my act was reviewed in Field and Stream."
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"Every time I get in an elevator, the operator says the same thing to me: 'Basement?'"
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"When my parents got divorced, there was a custody fight over me. ... and no one showed up."
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"I never got girls when I was a kid. One girl told me, 'Come on over, there's nobody home.' I went over. There was nobody home."
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"When I was 3 years old, my parents got a dog. I was jealous of the dog, so they got rid of me."
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"When we got married, the first thing my wife did was put everything under both names - hers and her mother's."
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"With my wife, I don't get no respect. The other night there was a knock on the front door. My wife told me to hide in the closet."
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"With my wife, I get no respect. I fell asleep with a cigarette in my hand. She lit it."
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Post by Dr. Purple Goddess on Oct 5, 2004 21:53:41 GMT -5
He died?  Very nice Homage B'man...I'd call that respect |
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Post by bitterman on Oct 5, 2004 21:57:51 GMT -5
I didn't even know he was SICK. ;D
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Post by IllyriaWorshipper on Oct 6, 2004 1:36:02 GMT -5
What ever you do, don't look in a mirror, you already have enough bad luck as it is.
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Post by TealBox on Oct 9, 2004 14:46:28 GMT -5
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Post by singingypsygrrl on Oct 9, 2004 17:40:51 GMT -5
This is similar to one of Bittermans, but I think it's funny so here it is.
Purple, because ice cream has no bones
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Post by tjaman on Oct 9, 2004 18:10:36 GMT -5
Because my age is a secret.
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Post by bitterman on Apr 25, 2005 19:05:51 GMT -5
Because his d*ck was stuck in the chicken.
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Post by Charisma69 on Apr 25, 2005 21:34:31 GMT -5
Because his d*ck was stuck in the chicken.  |
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Post by Aunt Arlene on Apr 25, 2005 22:15:44 GMT -5
Aren't your ears getting cold too?
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Post by Bango on Apr 26, 2005 2:37:02 GMT -5
Because his d*ck was stuck in the chicken.  |
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