Crossover Madness!

[tjaman]

Thanks!

* so looking forward to reading Auntie's * ;D

[Aunt Arlene]

Meredith Grey wakes up to a massive hangover. She can't quite remember the events of the previous night. She looks out her window and is greeted by another gray Seattle morning.

She rolls over in her bed, but stops short. There is a man in her bed. She groans.

Meredith: I did it again. God help me, I did it again.

She gets out of bed and throws on a robe. The man in her bed stirs as she disturbs the bed.

Meredith: I'm going to go take a shower. When I came back, you'll be gone, right?

She gets a grunt in return. Hoping it was a yes, she runs off to the shower. When she returns she finds her one night stand has indeed left. She sighs with relief.

She heads downstairs for some coffee and finds George and Izzy at the kitchen table.

George: Who was that I saw leaving? You didn't. Not again.
Meredith: I did.
Izzy: He was rather large and glowery, wasn't he?
Meredith: Let's not start this.
George: Fine. We're going to be late for work anyway.

As they leave for the hospital, a perfectly appropriate song begins to play. Not sure which one exactly, but it is wildly appropriate.

On the other side of town, Cynthia is nervous. They are holed up in a hotel room.

Wesley: Where did you last see him?
Spike: We had a lead that our demon might be near the hospital. Seems he likes to hang out in morgues. We checked it out but it was a bust. We stopped in a bar to use the pay phone, but he couldn't get through to you. I stayed for a pint. Last I saw Angel was chatting it up with some girl. Blah, blah, blah, isn't my coat just fabulous? That sort of thing. I could barely keep my beer down so I buggered off.
Fred: You shouldn't have done that, Spike. You know how he's been lately. You shouldn't have left him.
Spike: Oh boo hoo. Angel's lost his sodding way. A good shag might be just the thing he needs.
Wesley: Yes. That never ends with bloodshed and mayhem.
Spike: You really think he's going to find perfect happiness with a girl he met at a bar? Well, I might...
Gunn: Let's just find Angel. He might need our help.
Fred: What was the name of this place?
Spike: Place called The Emerald City Bar.
Gunn: Let's go.
Fred: Wait. It's daytime. What about Spike?

Spike throws the curtains open.

Spike: This is Seattle, luv. The sun shines about as much as it does in London. I'm amazed this place isn't crawling with vamps.
Gunn: Your ass just better hope the weather doesn't clear.

They head over to the bar. It's too early for it to be open, but they hope someone will be there. They are in luck. Joe the bartender is bringing in a beer delivery.

For anyone who doesn't know about Joe's other credits they should click here before reading on.

Joe: Sorry. We're not open yet.

Spike stares at Joe.

Spike: Have we met?
Joe: Not that I know of.
Fred: We're looking for a friend of ours. He was here last night.
Joe: I see lots of people every night. Can you describe him?
Spike: Very broody. Dull as a table lamp.
Joe: Hair sticks straight up?
Spike: That's him.

Spike stares at Joe again.

Spike: You seem very familiar. Are you sure we've never met? Ever been to Rome?
Joe: I'm sure I'd remember you. I think your friend was talking to Meredith. I don't know if they left together though.
Wesley: This Meredith could be in some danger. Could you tell us where we might find her?
Spike: Did you sell me a car once? It seems like you gave me something once.
Joe: (ignoring Spike) Try the hospital.

They head out again as it starts to rain. They reach the hospital and go inside. Joe wouldn't give out a last name for Meredith so they are at a loss.

Gunn: (sarcastically) Too bad we never made a living as detectives.
Wesley: Very droll. Now how are we going to find this M...

Izzy: Meredith!

The gang looks up in surprise. They see Izzy running to catch up with Meredith. They start to follow, but George and Christina join Izzy and Meredith. They follow the doctors to the cafeteria. They approach as the doctors sit down to eat. Alex notices the group and joins them as well.

Wesley: Sorry to bother you, but we're looking for a friend of ours.
Meredith: Have you checked with admitting?
Fred: This is someone you might have met at a bar last night.
Christina: You didn't. Not again.
Alex: When do you sleep?
Meredith: Look, I haven't seen that guy since this morning.
Alex: "That guy?" Didn't you even bother to get his name?
Wesley: Please. Did he say anything before he left?
Meredith: Like what?
Fred: Buffy?
Christina: Who the hell walks around saying "Buffy?"

Angel joins the conversation, much to the shock of Cynthia.

Angel: (quietly) You guys finally got here. I think the demon is in the building.

Angel notices Meredith.

Angel: What are you doing here?
Fred: Angel? Is it really you?
Angel: Who else would I...Wait a minute. You thought she...I mean she's pretty and all, but...you thought she'd bring me perfect happiness?
Alex: You'd think this would be a happier city.
Meredith: Hey!
George: (to Meredith) I can't believe you slept with him.
Alex: George, you're just mad because you got syphilis.
Angel: Did it involve a pissed off Indian?
George, Meredith, Izzy, Alex and Christina, at once: WHAT?
Spike: (a little spooked) A bear. He didn't make a bear, did he?
Izzy: Maybe we need a psych consult here.
Angel: Time to go.

The gang slips away and heads for the morgue, but Spike notices another doctor walking down the hall. She notices him as well.

Dr. Heron: William?
Spike: Hey, wait a minute.
Fred: You two know each other?
Dr. Heron: What? No.
Spike: Not really.

The doctor walks away, a little unsettled, as the gang continues to the morgue.

They enter the morgue and find their demon.

Gunn: All right buddy. That's far enough. You owe Wolfram and Hart $800,569 in lawyer's fees. Don't even think about skipping out on this.
Demon: Will you take a check?

Another wildly appropriate song begins to play...

[TheMasterGeek]

That was brilliant.

[Aunt Arlene]

[Charisma69]

That was bloody brilliant Auntie!





*Finally notices tj standing dejectedly in the corner*

Oh, I liked yours too. Really, it's not an afterthought at all.

Totally kidding of course ... or am I?

[GreatMuppetyNick]

Dang it, I wish I could read all that.

[TheMasterGeek]

I thought tj's was extremely brilliant, but I think Auntie's was just a lil more brilliant.

Auntie, you should give Shonda Rhimes a call, and see if you could write an episode.

[tjaman]

Very fun, Auntie. Nice tie-ins.

Oh, and Cordy?

[TheMasterGeek]

tj, I really think you should do a crossover with 24, maybe in post Not Fade Away.

[tjaman]

Actually, "Bones" would be a more ambitious crossover.

Haven't decided how to play that ...

[dEz]

tjaman said:

Actually, "Bones" would be a more ambitious crossover.

Haven't decided how to play that ...

I think you all should be trying to get these published. Share the wealth and sell them as a collective effort.

Seems original to me. But I'm just a by stander until I actually know Verse.

[dEz]

Oh! ... and I bet the guy that thought up and was published with:

Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon

... is laughing all the way to the bank. So ... just sayin' ... could be something here.

[tjaman]

* the squints are clustered around a mass on the examining table *

Bones: Well, there's plenty of tissue to make a proximate estimate on time of death.
Angela: Good structure, balance ... the coloring is off.
Bones: We're gonna need it fully masticulated.
Hodge: On it.
Bones; Victim appears to be male ... in his late 30s ...
Zack: Dr. Brennan, the pigmentation doesn't appear to be predicated on decay. Look at the tissue at the point of trauma.
Bones: Which point of trauma, Zack? Along with the plane of decapitation there appear to be two calcified protrusions along the periotemplar.
Angela: Yes, I wasn't especially convinced.
Hodge: * looking up * Periotem ... you mean horns?
Bones: * examining * Sharp blade, clean cut. Professional, assassin ...
Booth: Or ninjas.
Hodge: * stopped in his tracks * Ninjas?
Booth: My team ran into a clutch of ninjas a few years back.
Brennan: In Quantico?
Booth: ... Before that.
Zack: When you were a Ranger?
Booth: ... Yes. While I was a Ranger.
Angela: Where did they come from, these ninjas?
Booth: We were never entirely clear on that. Anyway, there was some indication they were cyborgs.
Brennan: First zombies, now cyborg ninjas. What fantasy world have you pulled me into here?
Booth: There are just some things about my past you're gonna have to accept.
Angela: Like your son?
Booth: How do you know about him? * to Brennan * What, did you tell everyone?
Brennan: That you have a 6-year-old son named Parker? Sure, I didn't think it was a secret.
Booth: Oh yeah. Parker. My son. That one.
Zach: There's more than one son?
Booth: Shut up!
Zach: Yay, we're bonding!
Brennan: You're acting very strange.

* Illyria and Gunn enter with a body bag slung over Gunn's shoulder *

Fred: Sorry we're late.
Gunn: It's not easy trucking a body bag through D.C. even these days.
Booth: Fred?
Fred: * coldly * I appear as I choose. * to Brennan, all smiles * Hi, I'm Winifred Burkle.
Bones: Ms. Burkle, I read about your expansion theory on exterior p-brane reductivity in interdimensional theory. What is your background in forensic anthropology.
Fred; Oh, forensic anthropology is old hat when you've walked the dimensions .. I mean I was trapped in a .. er .. nothing too formal.
Gunn: Seems to me y'all just like making things sound more important by putting "forensic" in front of it.
Bones: That may be true Mr. ...
Gunn: Gunn. Charles Gunn.
Fred: Angel, what's going on?
Angela: Well, we found this disembodied ...
Fred: Demon clown!
Zack: I do bathe every day, you know.
Fred: This one is still intact.
Booth: * increasingly nervous, lest ...* Yes, Miss Burkle and Mr. Gunn are ... forensic .. um .. investigators from Wol .. a law firm here in D.C. charged to recover that particular ...
Lorne: * ... this should happen * I thought you people would never get here.
Angela: AGGH!
Zach: Dr. Brennan ...
Bones: Booth, are you aware that this mass of tissue just uttered?
Booth: Yes, well ...
Lorne: How utterly ridiculous. * to Angela * Would you mind not doing that sweetie? I can't exactly cover my ears.
Bones: Zombies, cyborgs, ninjas and now conversations with disembodied green heads.
Fred: Our lives aren't like other people's ...
Gunn: We're basically here on a madeup case to rejoin our friend's head to his body.
Lorne: And about time, too. * shoots a look at the body bag * Do you see what they have me wearing?
Gunn: Hey, black is slimming.
Zack: * behind him * Blunt force trauma to the medula, an old injury, I'd have assumed ... mortal ... dull coloring ...
Gunn: * vamps out, turns towards him * I don't get out much during the day, little man.
Booth: Well, no one's getting perfectly happy here.
Gunn: * reverts * You folks gotta upgrade that curse one of these days.
Booth: Hey, don't look at me. I shooped. Wasn't for Spike you wouldn't even be here.
Lorne: I've got a terrible itch at the end of my nose. Could someone give me a hand?
Gunn: * opens body bag * How about two?
Angela: Nice threads.
Lorne: Thanks. Really, I can wear anything, but khaki just looks so damn good on me.
Fred: So Ang ..
Booth: Booth.
Fred: Right. Your alter ego. Booth, I think it's time we ...
Bones: Well, please use my table.
Lorne: * being put into position * Really, those ninjas came out of nowhere. It's like they'd been hiding in my karaoke bar the whole time.
Gunn: We'll get to the bottom of it in time. You're sure they were the same ones?
Lorne: With the slight headache to prove it.
* with a flash, Lorne's head reattachs *
Lorne: * sitting up * Thanks for the help, guys.
Bones: Any time.
Hodge: I've got the bugs ready, and ... hey!
Lorne: I won't be needing any. Nasty little things, get all over everything, only make a mess.
Bones: Booth, someday you're gonna have to tell me how you come to know all these interesting people.
Booth: No, I'm ... really not. You people good?
Gunn: * as he and Illyria walk Lorne to the door * We cool. Meeting's at my place tonight.
Booth: I'll be there. Spike back?
Fred: He and the Faith Slayer are taking the long way home.
Booth: Figures. He calls in, tell him he's a moron.
Bones: * as they leave * What was that all about?
Booth: What, I'm not allowed to have a personal life outside this show ... show ...case .. of death and decay?
Angela: Such poetry.
Booth: I've always liked your name. Later squints.
Bones: * as he leaves * That one would make a whole shelf-full of theses. Anyway, where's that ancient rune that other one brought in here? ...

[Aunt Arlene]

that was great

I'd much rather see that played out than the real episode form last night.

Interesting thought about Gunn, too.

[tjaman]

Thanks! Like I said, I could've gone either way. I had an idea where Angel and Booth had a conversation of some sort, but it got ... complicated.

That'd still be fun to see played out, tho, if anyone else wants to have a go.